No, the title is not a typo. I didn't mix up this post with my post about tofu, and while I do enjoy the sarcasm (when it is funny and not mean - see next paragraph), my wording should not be spoken with a caustic tongue. Through the process of elimination, that would seemingly leave only one other scenario -- that I've gone completely mad and am one bad day away from shaving my head bald and running about town in a hot pink wig.
I do venture into neurotic territory from time to time and quite enjoy the color pink (which isn't clear at all from my blog's template), but don't have any desire to put fake hair on my head nor am I inclined to see what my scalp looks like underneath all the blond stuff. In simple terms, I'm not crazy. (Yet.)
The reason Edelweiss' chocolates are the perfect way to clean up my act after six weeks of raking in the cookies, beef, cheese, nuts, pizza, enchiladas, etc., is not because they are made with mocklate or have been injected with illegal weight loss supplements, but because, in the words of Barney Stinson on HIMYM, they are "awesome."
Of course, not all Edelweiss chocolates are created equal. My roommate finds the fudge "too soft" and noted that the tiny $3 wedge she purchased there yesterday collapsed on her finger when she held it up. Over the course of my several visits to the cozy Beverly Hills chocolate shop, I also found Katherine Hepburn's favorite, the dark chocolate turtle, to be too small and deficient in the pecanage. I like my turtles to be over-sized and chock full of the nuts, like my favorite version at the Chocolate Soldier in Laguna Beach, and Edelweiss' offering is definitely one of the slower turtles I've encountered throughout the course of my chocolate + nut combo research.
But I'm not hanging out on the podium to be a Negative Nancy. I only say these critiques as way of warning to all those who might need to improve their diets with Edelweiss Chocolates and aren't familiar with the best the specialty shop has to offer. When I speak of the awesomeness, I am speaking specifically about the chocolate-covered marshmallows that are so transcendentally delicious that sweet tooth satisfaction can be achieved with just one piece. Rather than trying to avoid all treats post-holidays, I have found that it is far better to seek out small pieces of the best stuff available in order to ease the chocolate beast into submission. Startling said beast into post-holiday deprivation only makes him angry, and when the beast is angry, he will consume everything in sight without any regard to my health-conscious protests.
My careful research has concluded that savoring Edelweiss' lusciously smooth dark chocolate is the only way to tame the beast. Always freshly-made and pungently chocolaty, it is the perfect coating for the shop's homemade marshmallows. While there are several types available, including plain, mocamallow, mintmallow, walnut marshmallow, and coconut, my favorites are the aforementioned caramallow (caramel + marshmallow) and the toffeemallow (a toffee flavored marshmallow enrobed in chocolate, sprinkles and tiny toffee pieces).
For $5.25 total, my three chocolates were pricey, but it's all in the name of good health. I know my heart is thanking me for not gorging on a red velvet Sprinkles cupcake instead. I do right by my little pumper. Or more accurately, Edelweiss Chocolates does her right.