Thursday, July 16, 2009

How to make a scene at Pazzo Gelato

Step 1: Ask to sample at least three different flavors.

Example:

“Umm… I’ll try the almond chip and the… err… what’s that one there? Oh, hah! The sign says was it is! Der! Okay, almond chip and the peanut butter fudge, please”

Sample flavors and spot butter brown sugar pecan.

“Oh that looks yummy! Can I try that one too?”

Step 2: Spend at least two minutes attempting to decide what to order.

Example:

I could get the almond chip with the almond fig… but is that too much almond? It might be better with rocky road. Or hazelnut! But is it bad to mix nuts? The peanut butter jelly sounds good too, but that definitely doesn’t go with the almond chip. It would really go better with the banana mascarpone like a pb & banana sandwich, but there really isn’t much of that flavor left. And I didn’t even sample it! What if I hate it? It would be a waste of a Pazzo Gelato experience!

“Okay, I think I’ll get the almond chip and the almond fig.”

Step 3: Change order while gelato is in process of being scooped.

Example:

“Actually, I think I’ll just have one scoop – the almond chip. I already had a little bit of dessert at Cru before coming here, so I really shouldn’t have two scoops.”

See small size of scoop and reconsider.

“Oh. Umm… maybe I will have the almond fig too. Is that okay? Sorry! I don’t get to come out to Silverlake often, so I should just get both. Right?”

Step 4: Get flustered and drop wallet in front of long line of customers who hate you for holding up the flow of gelato.

Example:

Idiot! Just pay and get out before they pull a Soup Nazi and send you home without any almond figgy chippy goodness!

“Sorry… pardon me…errr… bon appétit?”

Step 5: Leave evidence of idiocy.

Example:

Male customer: “Diana? Is there a Diana out here?”

Wave from table on patio. “I’m Diana!”

“Here, you dropped these.”

Stare at stack of credit cards in his hand. “Oh. Oh gosh. Thank you!”

Shamefully rock head in hands. Then eat gelato as quickly as possible whilst friend laughs in the background.

Step 6: Confess sins.

Example:

Post scenario on blog with the hope that acknowledging the neurosis makes it less crazy.

- - - -

Pazzo Gelato
3827 Sunset Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA‎
(323) 662-1410‎

13 comments:

TonyC said...

FIRST!

On behalf of all the people behind you last nite: I hate this B***H!

btw, ya know.. Pazzo ain't going nowhere. You can just go BACK to try the other flavors?

Futile Sniffer said...

Hahaha, TonyC!

Those flavors look delicious. I love the idea of Almond Fig.

Melissa Good Taste said...

Um... total yum alert! Gelato is needed... it is hot out!

Gastronomer said...

Ain't no shame in holding up the line. Peace of mind is totally worth pissing people off ;-) Your sins are forgiven.

yutjangsah said...

hehehe. funny.

Jenn said...

Hahaha...you're story just made my day. When gelato is involved you want to be sure you pick the right flavors on that visit. lol.

Diana said...

Tony - Yes, I know. And I've already been there 5 times. I just have trouble making ordering decisions! I want it to be perfect every time!

Meg - The almond fig is wonderful, but the almond chip kind of stole the show last night.

Melissa - Agreed. PLUS July is national ice cream month.

Cathy - THANK YOU. Serenity now. Serenity now!!! (I hope you've watched Seinfeld)

Sook - Funny to you, but humiliating to me!

Jenn - It is important!

The Blonde Duck said...

You poor thing. They shouldn't get mad. You're a fellow gelato lover.

Elra said...

Sounds exactly like my husband every time we go to Rick's ice cream.

Kirby! said...

Pazzo is le best. And who cares if the hipsters get angry? They are always angry. Or high. Or making fun of something. So no worries!

Dana said...

Sounds SOOOO good!

Anna A. said...

Diana, I heart you to pieces!! You are a natural sitcom character, and almost made me pee my panties last night!

Anna A. said...

PS. haute pic of the gelato!!