Friday, January 15, 2010

Taking Down the Giant Peanut Butter Cup

“What… is it?” I ask, staring down at the inch thick, two inch wide chocolate in front of me with slight trepidation.

“It’s a peanut butter cup!” My dad enthuses, clearly proud of the box of Chocolate Soldier chocolates he has bought his three grown up children for Christmas.

My brothers and I exchange glances.

“It’s a biiiiig peanut butter cup.” We respond in unison.

Despite my appreciation for almost all things chocolate (excepting egregious Whitman’s Samplers and chalky Hershey’s bars from the drug store), I can’t fathom how to eat the oversized confection. Do I bite into it like an apple? Gnaw on it like a fried chicken drumstick? Eat it Seinfeld-style with a knife and fork?

I’m not sure.

So I wait, eating the chocolate turtles my dad also purchased us first, avoiding the giant peanut butter cup like I avoid polyester and the Valley. It isn’t until two weeks after Christmas that I finally decide to engage my stomach’s worthy opponent.

While I am tempted to jack hammer the thing into pieces and blend it into vanilla ice cream for a massive Dairy Queen-esque Blizzard, ultimately, I decide to cut the chocolate monstrosity into four reasonably sized pieces to enjoy over the course of four days.

The high-quality Guittard dark chocolate shell cuts easily under the pressure of my knife – there will be no need for gnawing action to consume it. I’m slightly fearful of the ample amount of peanut butter filling however, imagining that it will cement my teeth together like the poor bloke eating a peanut butter sandwich in the “Got Milk” commercial.


I push the unpleasant images out of my head, and press on, slicing the first quarter of the cup in the middle so that I can ensure to get a more balanced bite of both chocolate and peanut butter. I brace myself for peanut butter overload, so am pleasantly surprised when I discover the filling is somewhat reminiscent of a Buckeye. It isn’t sticky or cloying in the mouth – it’s smooth, the glue-like texture has been tempered by the application of what I imagine is powdered sugar. The resulting flavor is decidedly more refined than I’d anticipated – particularly when paired against the satisfyingly bitter dark chocolate. It’s a grown-up version of a Reese’s, in both size and taste.

I eat the rest of the giant peanut butter cup over the next three days, no longer fearful of the confection’s girth. I still prefer the Chocolate Soldier’s turtles, but, ultimately, it proves to be a nice change in my regularly scheduled chocolate routine.

Next time, however, I’m going for the jack hammer method.

Chocolate Soldier
1200 South Coast Highway
Laguna Beach, CA 92651-3183

(949) 494-4462

9 comments:

Austin S. said...

oooo... one of my mom's art students owns this place.. yes, she drives all the way from Laguna once a week

Esi said...

That thing is HUGE! I..like you, avoid the Valley as well. Good luck with the move!

Anisha said...

I've been meaning to try Reese's dark chocolate cups, but eff that... I'm hitting up Chocolate Soldier!

Alessandra said...

Your dad is the cutest! Your postings about him are some of my favorites.

Anna A. said...

Looks like a four day force to be reckoned with! I will have to check out this place in Laguna...soon!

Jenn said...

A big Peanut butter cup for little me is ust perfect. Yes!!! I'd drive all there way to Laguna just to get that. Maybe I will. I know I will.

The Blonde Duck said...

I'd peel off the chocolate and eat the peanut butter.

yutjangsah said...

Tell your dad he knows how to buy gifts that tickle the fancy and please the palate.

Diana said...

Austin - My dad discovered it one day when he was down in Laguna and my brothers and I have been reaping the benefits ever since! Love it!

Esi - Thanks for the luck!

Anisha - They are really something - probably not something I'd crave every day, but a fun treat.

Ali - He's crazy, but gotta love him for it. :)

Anna - Stop by Sapphire for a drink while you are at it! It's a really cool restaurant next door.

Jenn - The rest of the chocolate they sell is pretty darn tasty too!

Miranda - I know you would!

Sook - Hah, I will! And then I'll tell him that you said he should buy me more...