I thought I’d eat two more at most – just enough to stuff a second pita half. That wouldn’t be so bad, I thought. Two pita halves is only one whole pita – a completely reasonable sized lunch for someone of the Hungry-(Wo)man persuasion.
I was so convinced of my ability to resist temptation and potential stomach engorgement that I even offered the two remaining balls to my dining companions.
Because I couldn’t possibly eat seven falafel balls, two pita halves, my entire serving of tabbouleh, tomatoes, and multiple tablespoons of hummus in one sitting, could I? Even if I did ignore the baba ganoush (I have mixed feelings about eggplant) and the odd, overly-dressed cucumber salad, it would still be an absurd amount of food for any sort of woman – Hungry or otherwise.
So I left the two balls sitting on their very un-green Styrofoam plate for at least ten minutes after I’d finished my last bite of pita. I sipped my water, talked about how I needed to body slam the door to my hotel room at the Best Western to get it to open, and made deliberate eye contact with my friends rather than the falafel taunting me from the table.
Yet even as I pretended to be uninterested in what remained on my plate, all I really wanted to do was reach down, swirl each ball into the thick pond of hummus and then eat them with my fingers. Because food is meant to be eaten. Especially food that potentially qualifies as the best of a certain category (in this case, best falafel ever).
“I kind of want to eat them.” I finally confided in Ashley and her boyfriend Elliot after several more moments of internal debate.
“Do it!” Ashley charged, as she massacred her first of two pieces of baklava. (She’s quite fond of overindulging.)
So I listened to her, because I’m also quite fond of overindulging.
And then, because my stomach was clearly not engorged enough, I proceeded to demolish a piece of baklava ($1) for dessert too. It was a deliciously masochistic move that, incidentally, made it very difficult for me to move for the next few hours.
Fortunately, I wasn’t the one who needed to fit into a wedding dress the following day. That task was handled most gracefully by my stunning friend Caroline, who, incidentally, hadn’t eaten seven falafel balls, two pieces of pita, tabbouleh salad, hummus, and baklava the previous day.
495 S Pleasantburg Dr.
Greenville, SC 29607